So…this week something extraordinary happened in the Maude household. It was so unexpected that it inspired this post. Now, before you all get too excited let me warn you it’s nothing life-changing but I would definitely call it a small win. 🙌
As I mentioned in my first blog post, my husband Nick and I started our vegan journey late 2019 and it was a little rocky. The first six weeks or so were surprisingly easy, probably because we permitted ourselves to eat animal products if we really wanted to and this gave us a feeling of being in control. By cutting ourselves some slack, it allowed us to transition to a more plant-based diet without feeling like we were never going to have our favourite foods again. We also took it one week at a time which certainly helped as we could focus on short term goals rather than THE REST OF OUR LIVES (and we occasionally gave in to our croissant cravings!)
A trip to Vietnam and Australia proved a little trickier as there were animal temptations everywhere. Having said that, we actually ate some incredible vegan food in Vietnam but unfortunately towards the end of the trip, Nick developed atypical pneumonia, which left him quite ill and craving his ‘creature comforts’ once again. By the time we landed in Australia, he was ALL VEGGED OUT.
Now, Nick has never been a huge veg eater. When I first met him, his repertoire was limited to carrots, white potatoes, broccoli, peas and beans. Anything else scared the bejesus out of him. Over the years it has been a gradual process of introducing new veg into his life in sneaky ways (yes, like dealing with a child). The result being is that he has now reached the stage where he classes avocado as an edible food which is another huge *win* for an avocado-obsessed Aussie like myself. But I digress…
The reasons Nick is (mostly) vegan can be broken down into key points:
- He doesn’t like cooking so will eat whatever I cook.
- He physically felt the benefits of eating plants straight away (lost weight, had more energy, felt lighter) so this keeps him inspired.
- He is an animal lover and doesn’t like the thought of eating them
- He wants to ‘stick it to the man’ and not go along with the meat-eating crowd just because ‘it’s the way it has always been.’ (Yes, he’s also a bit of a conspiracy theorist but I’ll save that for another post). 😳
Whilst these reasons are enticing, they haven’t been completely successful at keeping him on the ‘V train’ all the time. The obvious exceptions to this have been:
- Eating out at a restaurant
- Attending a party
- Having a BBQ
I think BBQing and meat are so intrinsically linked; add to this the gender stereotype of men ‘standing around the barbie with a beer’ and it becomes very difficult to break away from this. We have always loved a summer BBQ in the Maude household (I’m Aussie after all!) and whilst last summer I happily transitioned over to Linda McCartney sausages and burgers, this was totally not going to fly with Nick. That is….until this week!
Yep. We fired up the BBQ and as usual, I gave Nick the option to go meat (we had a couple of patties in the freezer) or to go vegan and he WILLINGLY jumped onboard that V train! Well, I was pretty flabbergasted as this was a man who traditionally piled his plate high with meat topped with a burger bun and totally skipped the salad. To see him stand before me with a plate full of veg was a picture-perfect moment.
The reason for this sharp turnaround? He just ‘didn’t feel the need to eat meat.’ He felt that the only reason he would be eating it would be out of habit because that is what he had always done. He no longer craved the taste and didn’t want to ‘contaminate his body with beef.’ Well, to hear my husband use the word ‘contaminate’ and ‘beef’ in the same sentence was truly gobsmacking. Better still, he absolutely LOVED his meal! This got me thinking…why did he enjoy it so much now when a year ago he would have been left feeling dissatisfied? I think there are a few reasons:
- He willingly decided to forego meat and wasn’t pressured into it by anyone else
- He didn’t expect the veggie meat substitutes to taste exactly like meat (he prioritised flavour over texture)
- He listened to his body rather than letting past habits dictate his decisions
So, what do I take away from all of this? So many lessons. The way we eat is so deeply rooted within us due to our upbringing, relationships, emotions and social customs. To re-wire that takes incredible will power and so we must have a cause that we passionately believe in. It’s not enough to do it because someone tells us to; otherwise, the change is unlikely to be sustained.
I have certainly been guilty of projecting my moral feelings and beliefs onto Nick. Because I embraced this new lifestyle so enthusiastically, I wanted him to feel the same. It’s taken time for me to realise that it’s ok if he wants to eat meat sometimes. It shouldn’t undo all the great work we have done in deciding to not eat animal products 99% of the time. And I’d be foolish to believe that I will never succumb to an almond croissant or piece of milk chocolate again!
At the end of the day, being an imperfect vegan is better than not being a vegan at all. 🌱
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